Half Empty or Half Full?

How can I look at my life? Do I say the glass is half empty because of the stress and danger I feel on a daily basis (food allergies will do that you), or do I say the glass is half full?

To answer this question, I must tell you about our experience at a hospital. It was Moutainview Hospital in Las Vegas, NV to be exact. What you ask? What does this have to do with food allergies? Well, I had to register my son for a surgery, the son who has severe nut, peanut, and sesame allergies, the one who has his mommy's eyes on him most of the time. The one whose parents and family make sure that everyone who comes into contact with him knows about the severity of his allergies.

I woke up the day before his surgery and my morning started with a panic. An elephant was sitting on my chest. Nightmarish thoughts had held me hostage before I even stepped out of bed. Thoughts like, what if somebody eats waffles and peanut butter for breakfast tomorrow? What if the surgeon and anesthesiologist are health nuts and eat nuts or perhaps an energy bar? After all, the surgery is at 7:00am. Maybe they’ll grab a banana nut muffin at Starbuck’s on the way. Do any of these people know that 1/250th of a nut could potentially send my child into anaphylaxis? What if the nurses have peanut M&M's hidden behind the medical files and they touch the files and then my son? What if they sneeze on something that comes into contact with my son? What if they can't administer the epinephrine fast enough?

Clearly, to answer these questions for myself, I would have to have a chat with the hospital personnel. One would think this is something that has already been addressed and that there is a policy regarding people with food allergies. BUT let me assure you that it has NOT! At least not yet!

Naturally, I wondered how one approaches medical professionals about making sure they are aware enough about my son's food allergies without insulting them or making me look like a psycho mom. I called up my food allergy support group, and I spoke with other moms. I took in their suggestions. I rehearsed what I would say and just took a deep breath before I went in to the hospital to preregister.

When I informed the registration person named Ana about my son's allergies, she actually stopped typing and talked with me about them. That was my first clue that I wasn’t just a person giving data. We actually had eye contact. When I requested that they order Epi-Pen's to keep on the surgical table (just in case), she took me seriously. She called the pre-admitting nurse, and made sure that I could talk with someone right then and there.

The preadmissions nurse, Bianca, whose name I’ll never forget, had been expecting me and genuinely wanted to make sure that everything would be safe for my son. We went over all the scenerios I could imagine. She informed that her niece had the same type of allergy (it's horrible but it was also a relief). She told me that she would make sure none of the nurses had food with nuts out tomorrow, and that there were signs posted everywhere. She warned them that they should not eat food containing nuts. If they had, they must not touch him or anything that will come into contact with my son. She knew it was important that everyone on the staff knew about my baby's allergies.    Before she spoke to the staff, she said these beautiful words to me, “I want you to do something tomorrow. You must ask everyone if they’ve come into contact with nuts. If the answer is yes, they must wash their hands and take extra precautions around your son. You must NOT feel like a crazy mom. This is how you keep your son safe.”  I cannot tell you how comforting it was to hear her say this. It was like somebody giving me permission to love and protect my son any way I wanted.

 The reason this is so comforting to me is because I have already come into contact with people who resist the idea of people having allergies to food. They dismiss it because they didn’t grow up with anyone who had allergies. They think that it is a made up, new fangled disease that yuppie mom’s make up about their kids. Yes, it is an ignorant attitude and most people do not have it, but there are more than you know who do have it. It’s kind of like hidden racism. People pretend they’re not racist, but behind closed doors their real opinions come out.

So Bianca spoke to the charge nurses and their staff both in pre-op and in post-op on the surgical floor the night before. My heart is at ease.

On the day of the surgery, I never had to ask one person if they had eaten nuts that day because they were forthright about knowing about his allergies. Everyone we came into contact with told us that they knew how severe his allergies were. They assured us that the pre admitting nurse had given them all the third degree the night before and they took it seriously. Our surgeon, Dr. Nicholas Fiori alerted us that the whole hospital knew about his allergy which also reassured us. The staff double /triple checked everything they touched. They wiped down surfaces in front of us so that we knew it was safe. They took care of our baby and us. My son made it through the surgery and is doing very well. Now we are at home in our allergen free environment. The staff at this hospital absolutely gets it because of one person who went the extra mile. I hope that others in similar situations (be it an allergy or anything else that can be life threatening), the hospital always engages this level of care.

If you haven’t guessed it by now my glass is like an overflowing, never-ending ocean of love. All the people who care about us in our lives said extra prayers for us. And I got to see how they worked, when I really needed it. Thank you everyone.

Crawling Through the Mazes

I never thought that in all my years at the age of 40 I'd be crawling through McDonald's play area looking for potential food allergens left behind.  So before the kids play, I have my wipes in hand and scurry through the plastic mazes that my children find so amazing.  It is not so fun for me.  My body is not as flexible nor is it quite as tiny as their bodies.  Alas I make through.  It was pretty clean I'm happy to say.  Yes! Today my child can play in the mazes with the other kids.  And of course I have Epi Pens close at hand just in case. 

Another Day at the Park

Was today a food grenade day?  No.  But yesterday and the day before were.  A simple trip to the park is never simple for me.  It is for my kids though.  But for me, the trip entailed planning for food and planning for food encounters.   I think... Who will be at the park?  Are the kids or parents going to have food that my child needs to stay away from?  Is the play equipment covered with threats?

It was a perfect day at the park.  The kids were running through the water and chasing each other up and down the slides.  Until... I spot food encounter one. Child with sandwich.  The contents of this sandwich are all over his face and hands.   Is it a PBJ sandwich?   Why is that child walking around with a PBJ sandwich and touching every thing that my child will soon be touching?   Where is this child's mother?  I'll go ask her (because now I have to do things like this).  I pick up my son and walk into a group of moms chatting, and I politely as I can, I interrupt.  I say, "I know this sounds personal, but is your child eating a PBJ sandwich?  You see my child is allergic to peanuts and all nuts, and I need to know for his safety."  The mom was guarded at first, but then very nicely responded that it was pizza and that her child also has nut allergies.  She understood. What a small world!   So, the  kids enjoyed the rest of their day at the park.  This is how a park feels to a mom whose child has severe food allergies...everyday.